The Journey Here

Dear Readers,

My plans for the afternoon are temporarily on hold,  walk Jak + bike ride + thunderstorm = weather delay.  So I thought I would take a moment to share some thoughts that are rolling around my head on this Sunday morning. 

Last July I took a trip here.  It was the first time I'd been here in the summer and I loved it.  When it was time for me to head back north, I cried on the way to the airport.  I felt so sad to leave.  And it wasn't the first time I'd felt like that when leaving.  As a kid when we vacationed here I would cry when it was time to go back home.  When I had the same reaction 30 years later it made me think, why am I not living there.  And that is where this journey began.

In September I returned here again to look at potential houses to purchase.  Being back here confirmed my love for the area and climate.  In the eleventh hour of my trip I started the process of putting in an offer on a house and ended up extended my trip by one day.  That last morning I sat on the beach at sunrise.  To the south it was raining.  To the north the sky was pink.  In front of me the sun was rising and behind me there was a rainbow.  It was in that moment that I really felt like I belong here.  I took the these pictures that morning.

After returning home from that trip, well, life happened.  Buying a house from a thousand miles away became complicated.  Especially in an unstable housing market.  After six weeks of going through the process and feeling beat down, the bank told me they now wanted 25% down and I said no way.  During this same time, my cousin's two year battle with cancer was coming to an end.  In December I had planned another trip back here for what was to be the closing on said house.  I was leaving on a Thursday and on Tuesday of that week I attended my cousin's funeral.  My trip changed from house buying to apartment hunting and unlike the previous mentioned trips, I wasn't in love with being here.  I was in survival mode, reeling from the events of the past few months.  I returned to work on the following Wednesday and was told on Friday that my job of 12 years was being eliminated.  That Friday was 4 days before Christmas.  Stick a fork in me, I was done.

My point in telling about my journey here is this, it's been a winding road.  I went from feeling so good about moving here to barely being able to put one foot in front of the other.  The thing is, I made it.  I'm here.  And though life here has had its ups and downs, I haven't once regretted my decision.  If there is something that you are working toward that the idea of makes you feel on top of the world, hang on to it, even when faced with times of struggle.  The risk isn't in reaching for something new, the risk is continuing to do that which is not fulfilling.

Happy Full Moon Sunday!
Until next time...
Peace & Love,
Hope