Learning

Buongiorno!

Greetings are in Italian this morning in honor of all that I've been learning at work this week.  After six straight days of working (all of which requiring I rise before the sun) I am enjoying a few days off before I return to the grind (pun intended) on Monday.  Thankfully, my shifts next week all start mid morning. 

I have learned a lot this week, not only about my job but also about myself.  First I would like to say this, to anyone that thinks they know it all, might I suggest trying to learn a new job in a position you know very little about.  I for sure didn't think I knew it all going into this and now I am only more certain that I don't.  My colleagues have been helpful and supportive.  I am most appreciative of this.  I was guessing I'm about ten years older than most of the people I work with.  It was a reality check when I realized it's more like 15. 

My week of training has been with different colleagues which I think has it's pluses and minuses.  Everyone does things slightly different so in some cases I've been shown how to do the same task in more than one way.  In time I will probably develop my own way, for now it takes a bit of deciphering to figure out who's way is best.  Or at least the most right.  One thing I realized about myself is that if I understand why I'm doing something it's easier for me to commit it to memory, otherwise I am just mimicking and will probably have to be told repeatedly before I get it.  Given that is the way I learn best, it makes sense that the most helpful part of my training has been to learn all the different roles within the store.  The different viewpoints make the why of how things are done easier for me to see.

The company is big on making connections with customers (remembering names, regular orders, etc.).  I realized yesterday that it is also important to make connections with my colleagues too.  In a new situation, I tend to be quiet and observe.  Especially when I am trying to learn a lot of new stuff.  It finally occurred to me that to new acquaintances this might make me seem cold.  So I pushed myself to at least tell those around me that I am far more personable and funny than I first appear.  I said I am learning mode and will relax when I'm more comfortable in my surroundings.  And in just saying so, I started to loosen up a bit.

Since my life does still exist outside of work, my other news is that today I paid off my car loan.  Four months early.  If anyone is in the market for a new car and will be financing, I highly recommend bi-weekly payments.  For me it was so much easier to see half the payment go every two weeks than the lump sum once a month.  Plus when a month has five weeks you eventually get ahead of the payments and therefore pay off early, saving yourself interest.

I still find my solace in walking on the beach with my toes in the water.  I will leave you with a picture from last night's walk.

Happy Labor Day weekend.  Be safe.
Until next time...
Peace, Love & Lattes,
Hope

3 Days

Dear Fellow Animal Enthusiasts,

It took my dearest Jak only 3 days to figure out our new morning routine.  For those first few days when I got up early and started getting ready for work, he was interested but was fine to watch from a distance.  This morning, five minutes before my alarm went off he was already up and ready for action.  Why, you might be asking, well the answer is simple.  There is food involved.  He's been getting fed over an hour early and when I leave for work he gets a treat.  That's all the motivation he needs.

Today I was going to stop at the bank while I was out but I forgot what I needed at home.  I felt too guilty to run in and run back out on Jak so I decided to go to the drive up at the bank.  Well, my dearest Jak made out well there too.  While one teller was processing my banking, another teller came by and saw Jak waiting patiently (more like expectantly!) so she sent out a dog bone for him.  When my teller came back to the window she was disappointed she didn't get to give Jak a cookie so out came another one.  It's a dog's life.

The new job is going fairly well.  In addition to learning a lot of new stuff I am also on my feet the whole time so my body is having to adjust to that.  For those that don't know, my right leg is slightly longer than my left leg causing me to wear a lift in my shoe and periodic back and hip aches.  I was a bit of a hurting girl after work yesterday so I bought some sneakers that I can wear with my uniform and we skipped our evening walk last night.  Today was so much better with my new kicks.  I'm tired but the aches are basically gone.

Since I spent most of last evening sitting on the futon, I took the opportunity to call my cell phone provider and ask what I had to do to get out of my contract.  After some minor attempts to get me to change my mind I was then transferred to a "special" department that could talk about my plan.  I haven't been unhappy with the service, my plan was just too much for the amount I was actually using.  Low and behold, they had another (non-advertised) plan that they could switch me to which will cost $20 a month less.  Seriously, if you have some type of service plan that you aren't happy with, call the company.  There's so much competition these days, most companies will accommodate if requested.  But they won't offer if you don't ask.  So ask.

Until next time...
Peace & Love,
Hopeful

Taking Leaps

Dear Friends,


At work today, I was asked what I consider to be one of life's big questions.  It occurred when I was being apprehensive about trying a new task.  What I was being asked to do was take orders at the drive thru.  When it was my turn to do so, I emphatically shook my head no.  At that point the girl training me simply said, "what are you afraid of?"  In retrospect I think it was a brilliant question.  It got right to the heart of the matter which could then be addressed.  What I was afraid of was that I didn't know the menu well enough to hear the order and then enter it into the system so that it could then be made.  Once I owned up to my fear a solution was offered.  Because I was able to hear orders without being the one to take them, I was directed to just enter the orders into the system while someone else did the talking.  After doing that for a while, I finally got brave and started taking orders myself.  With lots of support, I did alright. 


When we are asked or ask ourselves the big questions, like what am I afraid of, if or when we are able to answer the question it's an opportunity to move forward.  It's like taking a leap through our fear.  And I think life in general is a lot about taking these leaps, big or small, because whether you hit the ground running or land flat on your butt you've still moved yourself forward from where you were. 

My life has had a lot of leaps in it over the past few months.  Moving here was a big leap, today was a little leap and in both cases I stumbled some but am no worse for the wear.  So come on, whatever it is, face the fear, take the leap.  Hop to it!

Until next time...
Peace, Love & Leaps,
Hope

Time

Hola Amigos,

For the past few days I've had the concept of time rolling around in my brain.  It's amazing how sometimes it seems to pass so quickly and other times it drags on.  And by clock standards it always passes the same no matter how it feels. 

Since moving here sometimes the hours have passed slowly but the days, weeks and even months seem to have flown by.  I have also noticed that with the more laid back lifestyle here, the passing of time seems less consequential.  Life back up north always felt more hurried.  I was having a conversation with my dad about this and he said that due to the changing seasons, there is always a deadline.  Construction, paving, harvesting crops, to name a few, all have a prime season and when it's done everyone is in a hurry for winter to be over so that it can all start again.

Some people have asked what I've done with my time while I wasn't working.  I really would've thought the lack of structure would drive me crazy, and a few times it nearly did, but for the most part I stayed busy enough.  I spread out my errands (bank, post office, laundry, groceries, Dunkin) so that I had a reason to get out each day.  I spent a lot of mornings looking and applying for jobs.  And of course walking Jak is not only a necessity but also gave me a purpose.  I thought I would do a lot of reading.  I didn't.  In four months I haven't finished one book.  I started a few and then lost interest somewhere along the way.  I have watched a lot of Downton Abbey.  I think I'm on my third time through all three seasons.  There is always something that I've missed so I haven't found them boring.  And I watch them on a rewards system: vacuum - watch an episode, do the dishes - watch an episode, walk Jak - watch an episode. 


Mostly I believe I did much better with the lack of structure than I would have thought.  I can say, even though I just started this week, having a day off when you're working feels way different than having every day off.  It feels more like a reward.  Like watching an episode of Downton Abbey. 

As I start to work more, I hope the time passes a little quicker than my first day.  When trying to absorb a lot of information the morning dragged on.  Hopefully when I have a better idea what I'm doing the time will pass quicker.  And either way, it still only comes one minute at a time.  Perhaps what is really most important is the attitude that we bring into each minute of each day.

Until next time...
Peace & Love,
Hope

P.S.  Writing this blog has also been a good use of my time and a great creative outlet.  Human beings are creative by nature and I believe it's important to find ways to express it.  I'm thankful I had the idea and follow through to keep it going.  As of writing this I've had over 2,200 page views in four months.  That is humbling!

4 Months, 5 Days

Greetings Readers,

It finally happened today.  4 months and 5 days after arriving in a new state, I have gone back to work.  It is a part time job doing nothing that I've ever done before.  I've decided not to specifically say where I am working since it is well known.  So I will just say they specialize in caffeinated beverages.

These past months have been humbling in a lot of ways.  Going from a person that hardly ever called out sick and usually had to use vacation time because I was at the point of losing it to being a person that had no where to be for months has been an interesting journey.

Jak has probably been my greatest day to day motivator over these months, in that I had to get up and out with him each morning and take him for long walks.  He was actually quite glad to see me after I arrived home from my shift this morning.  Perhaps he could tell my confidence level was greater than when I return home from doing laundry or something.  Even he had got to the point where he wouldn't always get up when I came in the door.

To everyone that has sent me good thoughts, contributions and well wishes of all kinds, thank you.  Your enthusiasm and generosity have kept me going.  I haven't once regretted my decision to move here.  Even on the difficult days.  I think there was one fleeting moment when the metaphoric storm clouds were crashing down around me that I briefly considered packing it in.  The thought was gone as quick as it came because it didn't ever really feel like an option I would seriously consider.  If there is something you've been thinking about doing, no matter how big or how small, I wholeheartedly encourage you to do it.  The risk in life is not trying something new.  The true risk is complacency.

 Take the step...

Until next time...
Peace & Love,
Hope

Almost Stepped on a "Frickin Snake"

Good Evening,

After feeding Jak his dinner and taking him for a walk, we were strolling over to the dumpster.  I was thinking about writing my blog when it happened.  I almost stepped on a snake.  It went scooting across the sidewalk where I was about to step.  Jak could've cared less.  I, on the other hand, could hardly breath.  There is a long history with snakes and me.  I won't go into it all here now, just the most told story.

It was my grandfather's 80th birthday.  My brother and I went out to the car to get the Costco sheet cake.  We decided to surprise my grandfather and come in the back door so around the house we went.  I was carrying the cake.  My brother said "just keep walking" and as I was trying to comprehend what he said or more so why he said it, I stepped on a snake.  It wrapped around my ankle and then took off.  I DID NOT DROP THE CAKE!  Or pee myself for that matter.  I immediately about faced, scurried in the front of the house and as my uncle videoed the arrival of the cake, the first words out of my mouth were "I stepped on a frickin snake!"

So anyway, the blog letter I was composing in my head when the snake incident happened was just to write about my Saturday evening.  I made chili pie for supper.  (Crushed tortilla chips on the bottom, chili, and cheese on top.  Bake in the oven at 375 degrees for about 30 minutes.)  It is a favorite of mine.  And then I watched the Revolution soccer game and could not have been happier to see my most favorite player, goalkeeper Matt Reis, in the starting eleven.  Matt is the most tenured player on the team and at 38 years old it's fair to think he only has another 5-10 years left to play.  (I'm kidding.)  He was the starting goalkeeper at the beginning of the season until the Boston Marathon bombings happened and his father in law was seriously injured.  He didn't play for a few games and that gave the #2 goalkeeper a chance to step up.  I'm totally bias against the #2 keeper so I'll keep my opinions to myself.  He's had a few bad games in a row and the coach promotes earning your starting spot so Matt Reis was back on the field last night.  And he kept a clean sheet.  They won 2-0.  Yay!


I hope everyone had a good weekend!
Until next time...
Peace & Love,
Hope

My Father's Daughter

Bon Jour Mes Amis,

Have you ever had one of those moments when you realize your parents' traits are coming out in you?  Yeah, me too.  When it's a charming or slightly quirky but likable trait, I take being a chip off the old block with some pride.  So here's one of those.  My dad  likes to talk to wildlife.  The deer in his field, the turkey eating his blueberries and the bunny that lives under his shed.  Just to name a few. 

I talk to wildlife too.  My beloved "yellow feet" at the beach.  The gopher tortoises at the boardwalk.  And at home, I talk to him...

Meet H. Bubs (which is short for Hubba Bubba because when he puffs out his neck it looks like bubble gum).  You might be wondering how I can tell H. Bubs apart from the countless other lizards that hang around my walk and patio area, well he lost his tail.  As you can see in the picture it's starting to grow back.  He was actually in pretty rough shape the first time I saw him so he is definitely doing better.  My friend Aimee says I can strike up a conversation with anyone and I guess that is true and includes all living things.  Like most wildlife, H. Bubs doesn't have much to say but I ask how he is and what's up anyway.  Perhaps he just thinks I'm crazy, as my neighbors probably do also.  

Hey, there's no harm in acknowledging nature.  And the next time my dad visits, I'll introduce him to H. Bubs.  I'm sure Dad will have plenty to say to him too.

Until next time...
Peace & Love,
Hope

P.S. There have been several incidents with insects where I may not have been so cordial.  There was the time I stepped in a hill of fire ants with flip flops on and got stung many times.  And then there was the time I was walking Jak and a got a no-see-um stuck in my bra.  I was by a busy road.  At rush hour.  So the only thing I could do was hurry Jak along and beeline it back to my apartment.  No-see-ums are also known as sand gnats.  They are tiny little bugs that have a wicked bite, especially when they are trapped where you can't brush them off.  Take it from me, not fun.

Meet Norma

Salutations Assorted Blog Readers,

Today I would like to introduce you to my plant, Norma.  She is a Peace Lily.

Norma made the trip south with me.  She was given to me as a parting gift when my position of 12 years came to a somewhat abrupt end.  Before Norma, I rescued a similar plant from a colleague that was badly in need of some TLC.  Actually more like CPR.  That plant I called Norman.  I'm sorry to say that my efforts to revive Norman did not work.  And yesterday after being very dry and cooking in the hot August sun, I thought Norma was going to meet a similar fate.

While Norma was in a limp state, I decided to cut away some of the leaves were dying anyway and turning brown and black.  Underneath the dead leaves I found that there were new leaves waiting for their day in the sun and a chance to flourish.  This reminded me of another one of my metaphors that I came up with last summer when I planted and cared for the flower boxes on my mom's deck.

Caring for a plant is a metaphor of life.  If we take the time to sort through and cut away the old stuff on the surface, chances are there is something new and fresh underneath just waiting for its turn to thrive.  If the old stuff is not removed,  it will live on but not to its true potential.  When we have the courage and perseverance to find out what is waiting for the chance to bloom, the possibilities are endless.

I am happy to say that the above picture was taken this morning and Norma has sprung back to life.  Thankfully she did not meet the same fate as Norman.  And with the growth underneath given a chance to come through, I noticed there is a new blossom.  Perfect.

Until next time...
Peace Lily & Love,
Hope

Happy Hearts Day

Buenos Dias Seniors & Senioritas,

No worries, you didn't fall asleep last night and wake up in February.  It's not Valentine's Day, at least not officially.  I always like to see hearts in unexpected places.  Perhaps to me it is a reminder that when we choose to notice it, "love actually is all around us."  The following picture is of the sidewalk that Jak and I take on our morning walk.  I've come to look for it each time we go that way.

Here is a concept I'm pondering this morning.  What if life isn't about taking a certain path, but instead life is the path.  The choices we make, the places we go, the relationships we build are not at the destination.  They are all the path.  It's not leading to something to come, the path is here and now. 

In my previously mentioned struggles with anxiety, something that helped ground me and change my focus was the realization that we can only deal with what is.  Anxiety is worrying about an event or situation that may or may not happen, essentially it is creating angst in the present moment about something that doesn't exist.  When in reality, in the moment we can take action toward anything that arises.  I'm sure we've all done something and afterward thought that before doing it, it seemed impossible.  We truly are braver than we think.

Since my arrival here, the times when I have struggled the most are when I feel uncertain about the future or when I lament about decisions I have made.  The truth of the matter is, the past no longer exists and the future doesn't ever come.  All we have is right now.  That is the path.  And it is through our free will that we direct that path.  Each day, one moment and decision at a time.  As I like to say, live the journey.

So today on your path I wish you the clarity to choose good direction.  And most especially I wish for some unexpected hearts to come your way. 

Until next time...
Peace & Love,
Hope

Low Key Day

Dear Readers,

Tonight I had planned to go to the local race track a few miles up the road and take in some Saturday night short track racin'.  Yesterday was a day of a lot of activity and so today ended up being a quieter day and the thought of listening to loud race cars lost it's appeal.  For today anyway, one of these days I will make it up there.

This afternoon I watched a movie about a dog.  One time I tried to loan my friend Meghan a book I read about a dog and she declined, saying she knows how those types of books always end.  Well Meghan, point taken.  Dog movies end up being tear jerkers too.  The name of the movie is Hachi and if anyone intends to watch it skip to the next paragraph because I'm about to spoil the plot.  It's about a guy who finds a puppy at the train station and against his wife's wishes he ends up keeping the dog.  The guy takes the train to work each day and each day the dog escapes from their fenced in yard and goes to meet his master at the train station.  Finally the guy stops fighting it and just lets the dog walk with him in the morning and come back and wait for him in the evening.  To make a long sad story short, the guy ends up dying and the dog continues to wait at the train station for him.  For ten years.  It's based on a true story from the 1920's in Japan.  To this day in that Japanese town there is a statue of Hachi.

As sad as it was to watch, it was also heartwarming.  The loyalty was astounding.  And it made me take a moment to appreciate my loyal companion.  My Jakky is there for me every step of the way.  As long as I have food.  In lieu of heading out to the races, I took my pooch for a walk on the beach.  Because kidding aside, he really has been good company on this journey.

For a change, there were no storm clouds looming in the evening sky so I lugged my camera along to snap a few shots.  I had been wanting to take some pictures to compare with the ones I posted from the other side of the inlet.
                            

This is the previously posted picture from across the inlet.

This second picture is taken at the top of the stairs in the middle of the first picture, it's of where I was standing when I took the above.

The third picture was taken across the inlet, note the rocks in the background.

View of the rocks from our side of the inlet.

In other news, I have a part time job on the horizon.  That was part of the activity from yesterday.  Details will be released once I have officially started working.  Hopefully that will be next week sometime.

Until next time....
Keep on truckin'.
Peace & Love,
Hope

P.S.  I have to post a shot of my favorite bird to watch at the beach.  I call them yellow feet, because, well they have yellow feet.  That's very imaginative, I know.

Hopeful

Greetings to All,

From the day I met my friend Colleen probably almost 15 years ago, she hasn't ever called me Hope.  To her, I have always been Hopeful.  And how nice it is to have always been greeted that way and to receive mail addressed to Hopeful.  Though we remained in touch, I hadn't seen Colleen for about 5 years. That all changed one Friday night a few months before I moved.  I walked into my favorite restaurant and heard someone say, "Hopeful!"  After the beat it took for my brain to register that it was Colleen, I screamed.  Not loud but loud enough for people to notice a commotion.  Then it was all smiles and big hugs.  It was a happy reunion and even the owner of the restaurant said to me with a huge smile on his face, "I love seeing that."

The true magic of the moment was for a dozen reasons I almost didn't go to that restaurant that night.  And Colleen lives probably an hour away from there and hadn't ever been in that restaurant before.  It was amazing to see how the puzzle pieces fell together that night.

I am thinking of this today because I came across an artist of interest that I was researching on the internet.  The artist is Kelly Rae Roberts and when I googled her name one of the pieces that came up was a figurine entitled "Hopeful Spirit".  The following is a picture of the figurine and I will post after what it says on it as it is a bit difficult to read.

  Hopeful spirit. 

In our best moments, 

we understand that our vulnerabilities are what connect us, 

that there is beauty in every step of the journey, 

that we can love bravely. 

Offer comfort to our younger, broken selves, 

and soar, always soar on the brightness of being alive. 

I love the sentiment of it.  I am also partial to the bird on top of the figurines head.  (Hey Mom, remember those magnets in the flower shop I was telling you about?  It's the same artist!)

On several occasions this past week I have opened my mailbox to find some love inside.  Thank you for the encouraging words and generosity.  It means so much me.  As does the breathing room it gives me.  I am a hopeful spirit and will persevere with patience and determination.

Until next time...

Peace & Love,

Hopeful

P.S.  I went out to run errands today in my silly hat that I usually only wear to walk in the rain.  The first person I interacted with said, "I love your hat."  Perhaps it's not so silly after all.

Appreciation

Dear Peeps,


Some of you reading this probably don't know that for many years I saw a therapist.  I started seeing her because I suffered from anxiety.  The main issue that would cause my anxiety to flair up was traveling.  At the time I entered into therapy, I wanted to take vacations and couldn't get out of my own way to do so.  It was easy to think my issue was caused by flying but it was not.  If I could get myself to the airplane I would be fine.  It took time and self work for me to finally understand that what really triggered my anxiety was disengaging from life.  Letting things go, giving myself permission to take a break and trust that all would be well in my absence from day to day life.  And of course throughout my time in treatment there were other life matters that cropped up and had to be worked through.  There were sessions with epiphanies and there were sessions that I left feeling annoyed and thinking I probably wouldn't go back.  I did go back.  Bi-weekly at first, then once a month and eventually only as needed.

When I finally had set my plans in motion to make the move here I decided that even though I hadn't seen my therapist in months, I would like to see her before I left.  I realized that I had gone from being the girl that couldn't take a trip to being the woman that was moving there.  It was what Oprah would call a full circle moment.  And it was in these moments I realized that though I felt sadness to be moving away I also felt so much gratitude.  I started thinking that if sadness was a card that I could flip over, then the opposite side of it would be appreciation.  For in order to feel sadness, something worth appreciating must be experienced. 

The following is my go to Youtube video to put a smile on my face, hope it does the same for you:

Until next time...
With Gratitude, Peace & Love,
Hope

P.S.  Do something today that your future self with thank you for!

A Different Perspective

Howdy Friends,

Today I am back to my usual format, a letter to all of you.  I was having a conversation with a neighbor this afternoon and it made me think of something I wrote I yesterday.  How the slightest shift in perspective (or circumstance) can shift our focus.  The reason the conversation made me think of it was because this woman I was speaking with asked if I was a baker.  And though I do bake cookies periodically I wouldn't consider myself a baker.  She said since I have a stand mixer she figured I was probably up at four in the morning baking.  (It took me a minute to figure out how she knew about my KitchenAid and then I realized when I have the front door open for Jak she can probably see it on my counter.  Or she's a creeper and looks in my windows.)   It was interesting to hear this perspective of myself.  I think it can be enlightening to hear how others perceive us.

Tonight Jak and I went on an adventure.  After months of walking the dog beach on our side of the inlet, we trekked around to the other side.  I say "trekked" because to get there is an 18 mile drive, one way.  One must drive north, cross a bridge and then drive back south to get there.  I thought it was interesting to see the perspective from the other side.  The boardwalk there is wider, the dog beach is much smaller.  I'm glad we went to try something new but I don't see us visiting there often.  Jak is fine with not going back soon.  The car ride was too long for his liking and not even some Madonna "Like a Prayer" or Michael Jackson "Man in the Mirror" blasting out of the radio made the added travel worth it for him.  (Perhaps it was my singing and dancing along that he really didn't like.)  Silly dog.

Here are some pictures from our journey tonight.  Poor Jak.  I told him what the signs says even though he's pretending not to see it.

M-I-C  See you real soon.  K-E-Y  Why? Because we like you.  M-O-U-S-E
Until next time...
Peace & Love,
Hope

Dear Hope,

Today I am stepping away from my usual format to try something a little different.  I have read that if we could talk to ourselves the way we would talk to a friend, it can quiet that inner critic that lives in all of us.  So today, I am going to write an open letter to myself.

Dear Hope,

Congratulations!  You did something you weren't sure you could do.  You packed up and moved away from all that you knew for so long.  Proof that you are braver than you think.

I know that your time in a new place has come with some struggles.  Take heart.  Struggles are part of life, they will happen wherever you are.  And life doesn't ever happen the way we think it will.  Usually it turns out better.  Life is always more succinct in retrospect, so try to embrace instead of deny the uncertainty that each day can bring.  For it's in the arms of uncertainty that life truly unfolds.

Remember to laugh, Hope.  That is the medicine for the soul that no money can buy.  Laugh at yourself, laugh with others, laugh at sweet Jak when he turns around 7 times, flops down and then jumps back up because he landed on his Kong that he was trying to avoid in the first place.

Believe that delays are not denials.  Things unfold as they should and as you've seen time and time again the slightest shift in circumstances or perspective can make a mountain of difference.  Believe also in your self worth.  You are kind and caring, smart and pretty and bring a healthy outlook of the world to yourself and others.  Don't hide who you are or conform.  Share it with the world.

You have a wonderful support system around you, don't be afraid to lean into it when you're having a hard time.  And be sure also to reach out to them when times are good.  Appreciating and sharing with others is part of the circle that makes a support system work.  You try to be the friend that is always there for others, allow them be there for you too. 

Smile, kid.  You're doing better with all this than you let yourself think.  Sure you've had some stumbles but it's not about how we fall down, it's about how we get back up.  There is no success without failure.

Keep on keeping on.  You're doing great.
Peace & Love,
Me